You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
