i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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