our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
