nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
