You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize