weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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