Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
