Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.