I must be too annoying 4 u.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
