you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize