she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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