oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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