Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
