How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
How naked do you want me to be?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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