i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
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