Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
