I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
