Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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