You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I would fuck him just for his dog
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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