I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
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