i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize