I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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