I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
