what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
