what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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