hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize
