I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
