I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
i believe in u and ur pee
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
