RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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