I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
