Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
