Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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