the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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