Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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