I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
