Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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