i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
The uberlube is also flammable
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
