I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
