I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
