i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Randomize
