you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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