Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
be right there i have to get my cape
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
