I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize