The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
