We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
high people should be assigned attendants
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
