you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
