She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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