Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize