Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
