Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
