He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
