She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
i think i just lost a toe
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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