batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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