Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
